SLAP!

14 Mar

It was 9:03 pm, I went for a quick trip to the grocery store to buy some snacks to munch on while watching a movie.
I pressed the red button on the security door in my apartment complex and soon was out of the gate and passing the stand where two women sell dried fruit and peanuts. The grocery store wasn’t far from my little abode.

And then a series of moments happened that put me completely out of my comfort zone.

A black BMW pulled up in the parking lot as I walked quickly past, I caught a glimpse of the blue and white trademark and admired the shine of the car’s exterior. I thought briefly about how much a car like that must have cost.

I continued walking.

A few steps later I looked ahead a few feet and shuffling in front of me was a man or woman, it was difficult to tell. Bowed head, eyes averted. Their pants were worn severely, and missing about an inch of material from the pant legs; I could see their ankle bones. My eyes traveled upwards, I noticed holes in the rear-end. One moment later I realized that this person was not wearing anything underneath. I looked away quickly in embarrassment. But couldn’t help myself from trying to see their face. Patches of greasy and matted hair covered their head enough to shield their face from my searching gaze. No eye contact.

Instant shame, instant guilt, instant self-loathing at my own wretched soul.

I continued walking.
Bought my snacks.
Exited the grocery store.

A white BMW pulled up in the parking lot as I walked quickly past, I caught a glimpse of the blue and while trademark and this time instead of looking in admiration, I looked in shame, guilt, even disgust. I thought briefly of how much a car like that must have cost.

I continued walking.

I am blessed. My life is worrying about what I will do next year.
Whoever that person was; their life is worrying about what they can do to survive the next minute. And if that minute comes around…

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