Rambling

5 Mar

EmptyShe’s got it (life) in the bag. At the age of 25 she was made a CEO. She was addicted to success. It is a drug to her.

Everyday she wears black stilettos, tight black skirts and a sharp black jacket over a silk bouse. Her hair is brushed to perfection, tight and knotted in a bun at the nape of her neck.  One glance at her and you’d think she’d walked off a tv set and onto the street. She walks at regular pace, head held high and pointed forward. Never does she take a mis-step.

Her desk is immaculate. Black pens and Sharpies. There wasn’t a need for pencils, mistakes are never made.

To hear her walk in the hall is akin to hearing the stern knock on a knobby knuckle against a hard wood door. Precise and calculated. Unrelenting.

To hear her voice is similar to an incessant chime that never seems to die away. Quick.

To see her face is almost like looking a soft, white, chiffon cloth, blowing in a morning breeze.  Blank and empty. She’s without a reflection.

She is recognizable to many, unrelatable and unknowable to everyone. Her heart is void of a beat, like a window that shows its viewer nothing. Empty.

Around town her name is known as Perfection.

***

Every once in a while, you’ll find, if you’re reaching too high in humanity, something will come along, trip you up, and serve you humble pie.

Oh yes, you’ll hike that hill, make it to the top, smiling and then oops! You slip on something or other and you come a tumbling down that hill you’ve just spent climbing. That’s life for you, and a good thing it’s like that too. After all if we spend then entire time atop a hill, we’d forget ourselves, we’d forget our humanity.

Here’s my point: after all that climbing, that pride of reaching the top, we need to have a good fall. We need mistakes to remind us that perfection is a dream. Without mistakes our pride would swell to the size of what-not and we’d never strive to accomplish anything, as we’d already have pride to begin with.

Understand my meaning?

Without mistakes, we would never understand the satisfaction of achievement and the pride that accompanies it. Without mistakes, nothing would ever be improved upon. Without mistakes, we would only be hollow, un-human. We’d never learn lessons, never build upon what we know, never apologize for blunders, never rekindle or gain respect amongst peers.

Take a look at your perception of a perfect world. What room would there be for creation? None. As everything is already “present to perfection”, we’ve mitigated the concept of “need”. Why? Simply because in a perfect world, there is “want” for nothing.

***

So why do I go around and around, repeating the beauty of making a mistake should be welcomed with open arms? Am I that woman, stilettos and silk shirts? Nope. But my heart (much like many a person’s) is pretty close to the one she’s got.

A tad empty.

Am I trying to convince myself that my mistakes are what make me a human? That they’re what make me relatable to people around me?

Of course yes!

How does a person recover from the mistake of an empty heart?

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4 Responses to “Rambling”

  1. roannamartinwvudietetics12 March 5, 2013 at 8:31 pm #

    Thanks for the reminder that “without mistakes, nothing would ever be improved upon”.

    • TriciaMaria March 6, 2013 at 8:10 am #

      oh man I know eh? Life is a daily reminder if anything…I just write about the painfully obvious!

  2. mox March 5, 2013 at 11:35 pm #

    The answer lies in the question- the fact that one recognizes that their life is devoid of connectiveness is a major hurdle to be honest about and so it is a big accomplishment.It is now easier to take the next step towards sharing what they have gone through, ie mistakes, with others . Allowing others to see our humaness and our humility engenders a warm relationship and deep friendships. Through this social network we can be of support to one another and learn/grow from our mistakes.

    • TriciaMaria March 6, 2013 at 8:10 am #

      love that word: humility. The ability to admit fault.

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